Quarehawk

According to my logfiles, here are some search-terms people have been using to get to this site …

“is des bishop gay?”
- I don’t think so, no. Isn’t he engaged to a girl?

“washing carrots in the washing machine”
- How I spent Christmas day is my own business.

“fat bald irish comedians”
- Is someone starting a support group?

“pat kenny’s sexuality …”
- … will never be discussed on this website.

“sharon ni bheolain boyfriend”
- Aw, she promised me she’d never tell!

“wine glass, japan, comedian”
- Karl Spain’s backstage demands are getting excessive.

“i pulled down my trousers and pants”
- Job-interviews are getting a lot tougher in this recession.

“colin murphy jokes”
- He certainly does.

“dara o’briain physics”

A few portrait commissions I did for Christmas gifts. Pics taken with a crappy phone camera. Why didn’t I get all these scanned before framing, so I could display them on the site more professionally and maybe bring in more business? Why? Because I’m a stupid idiot, that’s why.

A wiley psychologist, tapping his pipe out on his boot, would probably deduce that this is because sub-consciously I want to fail, because I’m secretly afraid of succeeding, and probably trace it all back to some childhood incident where my Da refused to buy me an ice-cream in 1978. But whatever, here are the drawings, badly photographed …

This is my friend Milly from work, who rejected my first cartoon of her for being “too revealing”. I responded politely, offering to draw her in a Burqa and chastity belt (I can be terribly sarcastic when I get going). In the end we settled on this.

But someday in the future, Milly is going to ask her new husband what he wants for his birthday. And he’s going to blush and stare at the floor and mumble and stammer “I’d kinda like it if you’d dress up in that outfit from the cartoon. You know, the one that O’Rourke guy did of you?”

And Milly will go “THAT PERVERT? I blocked his number years ago. But … okay I’ll do it”, and she will head off to the costume shop.

And that will be a vindication of me and my artistic vision. Oh yes.